seasonal affective disorder

bruised blueblack sky with white clouds, pavane op. 50 on the way back from work. i felt momentarily like i was escaping.

there's no such thing as severing the heart strings that connect you to people that you love(d) but the connections can dull and be felt less painfully over time. i could cry but it's a drought.

the other day on the bus i watched a woman systematically drink her way through a handful of those little paper milk cartons that you get in fast food places.

and i had twelve avocado maki rolls for lunch and had to stop myself making it eighteen. i could have done eighteen. i wish i had.

f