'we are creatures of the underground. we can't afford to fall in love'

hi, blog. i am very sorry that i have neglected you but you see i have not been having a very good time and did not want to record it. but i'm here now so hi. i have just watched Moulin Rouge with my friends. i love that film because it is beautiful. the colours. i remember when i first saw it it was the first time i've ever fallen in love with a film. it changed me a bit, i think.

so what have i been up to? i don't really know. i suppose i have been drifting around a bit, like that bag caught in the wind in american beauty. (right now i am listening to a song from noi albinoi. that is a beautiful film too, i'd say. all those mountains. and all that snow. i wish it would snow here and

i had a crap day today apart from this evening which was nice because i had dinner with my friends and it was nice to just hang out and talk and eat wantonly. we had an stimulating cultural mixture: chai tea - and naan bread with houmous - stir fry - chocolate cake and wine in plastic cups. in fact today is possibly the day on which i consumed more chocolate in one day than ever before, more chocolate, perhaps, than has ever been consumed by one person in one day. so congrats to me.

i have been watching the first series of frasier and have decided that it is not actually funny. the only redeeming features are the dad and eddie the dog. and the beautiful shimmering skyline of seattle that's framed in the window (I want to live by a big city window.)

the other day i read all of inferno in one evening. that was a good night.

i'm sleepy i want to live in rome paris new york. but i can't live in all of those places simultaneously unless i find a way of separating the self into several little bits and posting them off to each destination with little 'please look after me' tags on them (where can i get some of those?). because you can't retain your integrity if you strive to surpass human bounds, as i tried and failed to write about today in reference to faust and 'manfred' and doctor faustus. you know what else is a reference to faust? julien doré's song 'les limites'. i like doré, he is good. i also like gustave doré. he is also good. golden.

o dear blog what a mess this post is. but we have to forgive mess, sometimes

oh and i've got into the bad habit of cutting my own hair again. also i have new shoes. also i have decided that around 77% of people at cambridge are unbearable. probably including myself. also i think 'mont blanc' by shelley is one of my favourite poems and i'm going to read it before i go to bed. also, adieu, blog, i hope to speek with you again soon

oh and also i want to write a photobook. i don't know what a photobook is but i will decide and then try and make one and maybe it will be good and maybe it will not but i will make it my project for this winter. sittin' by the christmas tree workin' on my photobook. good night